the who
“God’s curse on whoever does not give substance to the words of this Revelation by living them. All respond: Yes. Absolutely.” (Deuteronomy 27:26)
“For in Christ, neither our most conscientious religion nor disregard of religion amounts to anything. What matters is something far more interior: faith expressed in love.” (Galatians 5:6)
When I read Deuteronomy, I feel like I’m reading about a God who lays down the law. A God of detail, who so clearly spells out the dos and don’ts of life. A God who brings curses on those who hurt their fellow man, on those who fails to live up to his words.
But when I read Galatians, it feels so opposite. I read about a God who’s calling his children to disregard a law-abiding lifestyle, and truly become free men and women. To love, to move according to the Spirit, not according to the comfort of religious texts and tenets. Hold these two books side by side, and it feels like two different Gods.
I feel the tension, not just in these passages, but in my life. How should I embrace a God who curses and a God who loves? Why do I desire to live a life of purpose and careful obedience to my father, when deep down, I know sin will just leave me falling so short time and time again? How do I live out the promises and calling of God, when it feels the promises and calling of God are too great a mountain to climb? How, father? It feels pointless, this tension between what I am and what I could be.
I can be so preoccupied with the ‘hows’ of life. How does it work? How will it end up? How will I walk into destiny? But in trying to answer the hows, God is moving me to ask bigger questions. Who am I? Who are you? Questions not of method and detail, but questions of identity and majesty. To learn to love myself. And let everything else take care of itself.
Maybe my father really doesn’t care about my ‘how’ questions. It’s that journey of who we are and embracing it that He’s consumed by. We are holy, set apart. Everyday, God whispers it clearly: Who are you? Who am I? Forget the hows. Step out of this tension that the hows create. And trust in a father who cares, who calls me to freedom.
Father, forgive me. I’m often consumed by the hows of life. But that’s not important. I am your child, covered by grace, an original. It’s not about how I am. It’s who I am and who you are that matters now.
May I build my life on faith in Father who knows. A Father who calls me to be free. Amen.
