the unexpected
“Stephen, brimming with God’s grace and energy, was doing wonderful things among the people, unmistakable signs that God was among them…His face was like the face of an angel.” (Acts 6:8,15)
Even though he’s mentioned in two chapters of the entire Bible, you get the feeling Stephen was a one-of-a-kind person. Everyone couldn’t stop singing praises about him. A man full of faith and the Spirit. Brimming with grace and divine energy. The face of an angel. Here was a man destined for greatness, destined to change the world.
Then, in the very next chapter, he’s brought to court on a false charge and is stoned to death by an incensed mob.
That’s it? That’s the inglorious end to such a Spirit-filled man? It feels so… hollow. An unneeded full-stop in a life full of exclamation points.
This strikes a chord because, deep down, Stephen seems like the kind of person I would like to be. He had learnt to live from such a pure, fresh spirit. Learnt to be a man of grace, to give himself wholeheartedly to the pursuit of faithhopelove. People spoke highly of Stephen. I admit, I would like all that.
But there is a sense that Stephen understood that life, his life, was not his own. That life takes us in unexpected directions, and to embrace every turn and corner, even if it’s the last one. That he was living under a Greater Calling - one that determined his steps and led him to places of pain, ignominy, even death.
To what extent do I live with such an understanding? To live from such a Spirit, not for the praises of man, but from an overflow of His leadership in my life? Am I so responsive to his leading that, come what may, whatever direction He leads, I listen and follow? Not for the praises of others, but towards the higher calling of the Creator?
Of course, it falls on me to learn to hear his voice. To sense his presence. And oh, how I can often muck it up. Even with this next step in my career, I have a sense of where my steps should go, but is this God’s leading or my own ignorant desires? Or is my doubt a mere result of faith pushing itself through the surface? I wish I knew for sure.
But to follow Stephen’s lead, I can only operate from his Spirit (or learn to) and move from there. Whatever the next events, I have no control. He’s conducting the symphony of life. I only listen to the music and play to his tempo.
Oh Father, I wish I could hear you more clearly. Or if I am, I wish I could have more confidence in it. But I trust you. You are leading me. You are.
Like Stephen, teach me to embrace the present like no other. To live from your Spirit and let life sort everything else out. I’ll grow tired Lord. Refresh me. Weed out the desire to hear the praises of man ring in my ears, so I can clearly hear your still, small voice.
Amen.
